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What's the exact error message? Have you talked to the carrier?
I would return the phone, have them swap yours out for a new one (If you bought it from the carrier) and have them activate it for you. And in the future, I'd personally just buy the gift, and leave it unopened.
If you'd prefer not to return it, I'd try to connect the phone to a Wifi hotspot and try the update there. It may not like the data connection you're currently on or if you haven't activated the phone yet, that's most likely the reason it can't update.