Angry [at] Birds

[tbod]

Here is what I would do:

1-Build a slingshot contraption, a few pieces of wood and a giant rubber band.

2-Go down to your local bird store, pick up a few blue jays, maybe some red robbins and yellow canaries.

3-Place said birds in slingshot contraption and aim for the birds on your roof.

4-Give yourself 5000 points for each bird you get.

This is my favourite answer, even if it isn't very practical...

We have lots of robins in the garden but quite a bit of force is needed to get the required range so they invariably end up going squelch all over your hand, very messy!

 

[zuben el genub]

Just to show how intelligent our crows are:
Crows tell the world who's bad - life - 29 June 2011 - New Scientist

Clever Crows Use Tools in New Way | Wired Science | Wired.com

They are also attracted to shiny objects and can act like packrats. They have dropped squirrel tails and dead snakes in my birdbath.

 

[lunatic59]

They have dropped squirrel tails and dead snakes in my birdbath.

That's an omen. It either means it will be a good year for olives or you will be overrun by Visigoths

 

[Tangent]

At a few of the local fields they have mylar strips tied to posts to keep the crows away. Same principle as hanging CDs, but the mylar strips will flutter around and flash more...

 

[Thefoodman52]

My face upon realizing there are 28 posts suggesting ideas on how to get rid of pesky birds on your lawn, and 431 people have read this thread.

 

[zuben el genub]

Try reading a complaint about other people's dogs shitting on your lawn!

Birds will decimate fruit trees and bushes. Some people may have one or the other just for fresh toppings on cereal, etc. in season.
Pigeon droppings are a problem.

My problem ain't dogs or birds, it's deer!

 

[tbod]

My face upon realizing there are 28 posts suggesting ideas on how to get rid of pesky birds on your lawn, and 431 people have read this thread.

What can I say? I'm a genius!

My Waving of Curtains, Banging on Windows and Maniacal Squawking seems to be doing the trick, they've either cleared off or learnt to tip toe quietly!

 

[tbod]

My problem ain't dogs or birds, it's deer!

Creatures of habit, deer, they tend to get into a bit of a rut this time of year. Have you tried throwing them a Stag Party? That usually does the trick...

 

[Sak01]

If you can't beat them, negotiate with them:
Joshua Klein on the intelligence of crows | Video on TED.com

 

[tbod]

If you can't beat them, negotiate with them:
Joshua Klein on the intelligence of crows | Video on TED.com

If you can't beat them either you're not quick enough or your stick's not long enough!

 

[Bob Maxey]

Has anyone any tips for getting rid of crows?

Indeed . . . just delete the application and you win. No more birds, angry or otherwise.

 

[Bob Maxey]

Scream at them. It works for old men trying to rid his yard of kids. Especially if the old man is weaponized. After some kids stole a rare manifold for a '60 Olds that as designed for 8 single barrel carbs, this old man deplores kids and the parents that churned them out just to piss me off.

Crows are a PITA. Have you tried reasoning with them?

I think I prefer the birds, frankly.

 

[tbod]

Scream at them. It works for old men trying to rid his yard of kids. Especially if the old man is weaponized. After some kids stole a rare manifold for a '60 Olds that as designed for 8 single barrel carbs, this old man deplores kids and the parents that churned them out just to piss me off.

Crows are a PITA. Have you tried reasoning with them?

I think I prefer the birds, frankly.

As you can see from my first post my current method of dealing with the little black buggers is to wave the curtains, bang on the window and caw maniacally. As you say, it is quite effective but hell on the throat!