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anyone else find apple support forum people to be mean?

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AF isn't friendlier by accident. It is heavily moderated to be that way. Trolls and flamers are warned, then shown the door if they continue their shenanigans. It's a trade off because sometimes interesting discussions get shut down, but worth it IMO. There's no shortage of snarky and condescending Android sites out there too.
 
It is as if they are reading from a script and can't really find a more personal way to speak directly towards you.
 
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