Germaine Jackson
Lurker
I'm new to smart phones, new to Android, and for the most part I like it but I've used it often enough so now it's at the point where some things annoy me.
Such as when I'm driving. I want to make a phone call in a few buttons as possible, so people don't die. To include myself. And the way the stupid thing is laid-out, there's a small green phone "phone" button that looks like it's supposed to "dial" but instead it launches a screen that asks me if I want to "join" a call or some re-stupid nonsense.
I don't know what "join"-ing a call is, and I don't want to. In order to initiate the "dial", I have to press the OTHER green phone button, that has the digits of the phone number on the same line. Which is stupid. You don't press the number to dial the number. That's just a secondary bit of information. I'm trying to dial "Alice", and I really REALLY don't care to see Alice's phone number. What good is that going to do me, anyways? Am I going to pull over, find an antique coin-operated telephone and insert $5.00 in coins and then DIAL the number? What's the point of spending all that time entering, updating and managing phone contacts if the stupid phone is focused on handing me the actual digits. How stupid. What idiot programmed this thing, anyways? Is he dead yet? Can I kill him? Is there a line? If I pay money, can I go to the head of the line? Can I use a katana? Garrotte? Both?
Maybe I can do a video waterboarding this Android programmer, and post it on YouTube. Bet it goes viral. I can't be the only one that hates him. </fantasy>
So, I'd like to modify this screen so that once I've selected "Alice" from the contact list there are only two (2) BIG HUGE BUTTONS. 1) DIAL and 2) TEXT. I want those buttons so big that they only display properly when the phone is oriented horizontally. It just kills me how stupid this is. I thought Android was open-source, and it's built in groups like Firefox? Is the collective really this stupid?
I've got a couple more gripes, but this is #1 and it's also the easiest. I'll give a general run-through on at least one more.
Put the phone in my pocket, while walking. "Ploik!" "Ploik!" "Ploik! Ploik!" "Ploik!" "Ploik! Ploik! Ploik!".
Go to use my phone an hour later. 10 people have called, but it didn't ring. It's now in "block" mode, and my ringer doesn't work. I also sent a text to my client that said "sk0kxkwo?kowiw0-123jswl asiwoeqw-1skakwc;a" and the Secret Service has me detained on the side of the road for having threatened the life of a Supreme Court Justice using voice-to-text. They found me easily, because my phone turned the geo-location application back on.
What re-stupid programmed this thing, anyways?
Wouldn't it be a good idea to somehow protect the "Settings" of the phone from accidental pocket-pool button pressing? I go to places like Wal-Mart and girls give me funny looks while I walk by because there's this "Ploik, ploik, ploik" noise coming from the area of my crotch. I think they think it's talking to them. "Hey baby! What's yer name?" in Android-language.
So protecting my settings, especially the geo-location track-and-report to the NSA feature would be really nice.
And finally, that stupid "Ploik, ploik, ploik" noise. Couldn't it just "beep"? I'd prefer a "Boop! Boop! Boop!" to "Ploik". I have choices for everything else, why am I stuck with "Ploik" ?
Such as when I'm driving. I want to make a phone call in a few buttons as possible, so people don't die. To include myself. And the way the stupid thing is laid-out, there's a small green phone "phone" button that looks like it's supposed to "dial" but instead it launches a screen that asks me if I want to "join" a call or some re-stupid nonsense.
I don't know what "join"-ing a call is, and I don't want to. In order to initiate the "dial", I have to press the OTHER green phone button, that has the digits of the phone number on the same line. Which is stupid. You don't press the number to dial the number. That's just a secondary bit of information. I'm trying to dial "Alice", and I really REALLY don't care to see Alice's phone number. What good is that going to do me, anyways? Am I going to pull over, find an antique coin-operated telephone and insert $5.00 in coins and then DIAL the number? What's the point of spending all that time entering, updating and managing phone contacts if the stupid phone is focused on handing me the actual digits. How stupid. What idiot programmed this thing, anyways? Is he dead yet? Can I kill him? Is there a line? If I pay money, can I go to the head of the line? Can I use a katana? Garrotte? Both?
Maybe I can do a video waterboarding this Android programmer, and post it on YouTube. Bet it goes viral. I can't be the only one that hates him. </fantasy>
So, I'd like to modify this screen so that once I've selected "Alice" from the contact list there are only two (2) BIG HUGE BUTTONS. 1) DIAL and 2) TEXT. I want those buttons so big that they only display properly when the phone is oriented horizontally. It just kills me how stupid this is. I thought Android was open-source, and it's built in groups like Firefox? Is the collective really this stupid?
I've got a couple more gripes, but this is #1 and it's also the easiest. I'll give a general run-through on at least one more.
Put the phone in my pocket, while walking. "Ploik!" "Ploik!" "Ploik! Ploik!" "Ploik!" "Ploik! Ploik! Ploik!".
Go to use my phone an hour later. 10 people have called, but it didn't ring. It's now in "block" mode, and my ringer doesn't work. I also sent a text to my client that said "sk0kxkwo?kowiw0-123jswl asiwoeqw-1skakwc;a" and the Secret Service has me detained on the side of the road for having threatened the life of a Supreme Court Justice using voice-to-text. They found me easily, because my phone turned the geo-location application back on.
What re-stupid programmed this thing, anyways?
Wouldn't it be a good idea to somehow protect the "Settings" of the phone from accidental pocket-pool button pressing? I go to places like Wal-Mart and girls give me funny looks while I walk by because there's this "Ploik, ploik, ploik" noise coming from the area of my crotch. I think they think it's talking to them. "Hey baby! What's yer name?" in Android-language.
So protecting my settings, especially the geo-location track-and-report to the NSA feature would be really nice.
And finally, that stupid "Ploik, ploik, ploik" noise. Couldn't it just "beep"? I'd prefer a "Boop! Boop! Boop!" to "Ploik". I have choices for everything else, why am I stuck with "Ploik" ?
