hi isitafox! it should be safe to disconnect the usb cable while the phone is "sending" as nothing is being or written or updated at that time. what you want to aviod is pulling the cable while the utility actually shows that its updating(youll see a bar and a % on the PC,and a green status bar on the phone screen)
however,be forewarned that disconnecting during the sending process will leave the phone stuck in ruu mode and unbootable until some commands are entered in fastboot,wich can be a lil scary if youre not expecting it.

its much better to let it error out,as you did,even if it takes awhile.
should you find yourself in this situation,and have some form the android sdk(some of us offer a "mini" version or full version,doesnt matter

) its a simple matter of opening a cmd window,making sure the phone is being seen with:
fastboot devices
then:
fastboot reboot-bootloader
should get you out of ruu mode.
if it doesnt,then the following command will reset the ruu flag thats keeping the phone locked in ruu mode:
fastboot oem resetRUUflag
and then,
fastboot reboot-bootloader should take you back to plain old fastboot
last and not least,when the utility fails with a 155,it normally works to go ahead and start the utility with the phone allready in fastboot.(boot to hboot,select fastboot from the hboot menu)
very importantly,make sure youve disabled or temprarily uninstalled any program capable of comunicating with the phone: htc sync,pda net,easy tether,recently ive heard even itunes can cause issues. im fairly certain there was
something running while you were trying to update,wich caused the the extremely long time frame to error out. typically that happens in just a couple minutes.
hope that helps
