Most 3rd party SMS apps have an option to show text in the notification or pop-up. Or you can install SMS Popup to add that functionality if your preferred app doesn't have it. Then the only question is whether your lockscreen will show the notification. If not then a 3rd party lockscreen app will solve that too (I've used WidgetLocker previously).
As for showing the name and number in the list of conversations, all the apps I know will show name if known, number if not. Not sure which if any show both. The one I currently have installed, Textra, shows just the name in the list but name and number when viewing the actual conversation. However, tapping on the picture when looking at the list of conversations usually brings up a pop-up with options to call or go to the phonebook, so you can always get the number if you want.