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Once I delete an email I've read on my phone, can I have it set so that it deletes it from the mail server? It's pretty annoying that I'm seeing these emails again when I login to webmail. I don't see an option in email settings.
I've been using K9 and it works great! If you are using IMAP and delete a message, it will be deleted off of the server and any other device that also has that e-mail set up as IMAP.
For example, I have a MobileMe account that I have set up on my iPad and on my Droid X. If I get a new message, it shows up on both. If I pick up the Droid X and delete the message, it will also disappear from my iPad. The same is true if I first read and delete the message on my iPad.
POP3 is a different story. You can set it to delete a message off of the server, but if you have another device that has already checked mail too before you delete it, it will stay until you delete it from there too. And sometimes it doesn't appear to delete off of the server at all, so I've had mixed results with POP3.
IMAP works great though with both Gmail and MobileMe.

Hmmm ... which version of K9? I stick to the mainstream releases, and am currently running K9 v3.803. The 3.9 versions were buggy.
On the Droid X, I empty the trash folder the same way you do, and have never had a problem.
The other way is to long press on an account, and pick "Empty Trash" from the menu that pops up.
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