wyndslash
Android Expert
Maybe it's because I've just finished my University academic requirements and am due to graduate in October, so maybe I'm feeling a little empty and generally lost about my future.
I'm Asian, and my parents are quite overprotective, and I'm not sure if my situation would be understandable, but given that many users here are parents themselves, perhaps you can give me your perspective.
Well, I'm 25 y/o and Finance is my second degree from which I'm graduating in Oct. I finished my first quite a while back and decided to go back to school to get a business degree as my parents wanted. Initially, I wanted to do an education degree but as that resulted in a fight (mainly because of the generally low salary teachers here receive), I simply decided to give in. And anyway, a business degree is always useful, so I compromised. And well, they paid for it.
Well, during the course of my studies the past few years (in my university, we can finish a degree in 3 years because of our trimester system), I worked part-time teaching basic Japanese and earning a little bit of spending money. Well, I decided to take up another foreign language (German, in this case), and this opened new possible opportunities for me again. My teachers encouraged me to apply to be an Au Pair once I graduate. It's a placement with a host family wherein they pay for you to study German (and hopefully something else) in a community college, and you help out around the house a bit and share your culture with their kids. At least, that's how it was explained to me. Well, being that I come from a conservative background, there's always been that itch inside me to travel and experience some things. I've traveled before, but never as far and not as long (6 months for this one).
So I suppose my dilemma is this: realistically speaking, I know my parents would not allow me to go, even after I applied (being stubborn and all that), and I can't help but feel just a little bit helpless and hopeless. Some of my American friends don't understand, but here (Philippines), family ties are very strong and I just don't think I have it in me to just pack up and leave and risk getting disowned by my family. And I've tried explaining it all to my parents, but they are not willing to listen because they think it's a dubious arrangement and I would just get kidnapped in Germany or somewhere (no offense to Germans and other Europeans; this is how they think). And well, that train of thought has got me depressed, because I don't think I'll ever be able to leave. Since I'm the youngest (and a female), they might expect me to stay and take care of them (there's nothing wrong with that; but I do want to be able to have some experiences of my own too). Well, they've told me that it's my life, but they still want me to do what they want for me. It's quite frustrating, especially when my dad talks about how life is short and that people should live their lives, or when they talk about some other person's kid being abroad. It makes me feel resentful, especially when I see others being free to take the same opportunity open to me, except for my parents' disapproval.
On the other hand, a part of me is also anxious to start working since I'm already 25 and as of yet no experience in corporate work. It might be even harder to get hired if I wait any longer. I suppose I would like to ask for a transfer to a branch in another country eventually, but that's another issue altogether (though still with my parents, unfortunately).
Anyway, I just don't know what to do and I just wanted to let it all out. The past few days, I've been feeling worse since I keep thinking about it. Writing it all out is a bit helpful.
I'm Asian, and my parents are quite overprotective, and I'm not sure if my situation would be understandable, but given that many users here are parents themselves, perhaps you can give me your perspective.
Well, I'm 25 y/o and Finance is my second degree from which I'm graduating in Oct. I finished my first quite a while back and decided to go back to school to get a business degree as my parents wanted. Initially, I wanted to do an education degree but as that resulted in a fight (mainly because of the generally low salary teachers here receive), I simply decided to give in. And anyway, a business degree is always useful, so I compromised. And well, they paid for it.
Well, during the course of my studies the past few years (in my university, we can finish a degree in 3 years because of our trimester system), I worked part-time teaching basic Japanese and earning a little bit of spending money. Well, I decided to take up another foreign language (German, in this case), and this opened new possible opportunities for me again. My teachers encouraged me to apply to be an Au Pair once I graduate. It's a placement with a host family wherein they pay for you to study German (and hopefully something else) in a community college, and you help out around the house a bit and share your culture with their kids. At least, that's how it was explained to me. Well, being that I come from a conservative background, there's always been that itch inside me to travel and experience some things. I've traveled before, but never as far and not as long (6 months for this one).
So I suppose my dilemma is this: realistically speaking, I know my parents would not allow me to go, even after I applied (being stubborn and all that), and I can't help but feel just a little bit helpless and hopeless. Some of my American friends don't understand, but here (Philippines), family ties are very strong and I just don't think I have it in me to just pack up and leave and risk getting disowned by my family. And I've tried explaining it all to my parents, but they are not willing to listen because they think it's a dubious arrangement and I would just get kidnapped in Germany or somewhere (no offense to Germans and other Europeans; this is how they think). And well, that train of thought has got me depressed, because I don't think I'll ever be able to leave. Since I'm the youngest (and a female), they might expect me to stay and take care of them (there's nothing wrong with that; but I do want to be able to have some experiences of my own too). Well, they've told me that it's my life, but they still want me to do what they want for me. It's quite frustrating, especially when my dad talks about how life is short and that people should live their lives, or when they talk about some other person's kid being abroad. It makes me feel resentful, especially when I see others being free to take the same opportunity open to me, except for my parents' disapproval.
On the other hand, a part of me is also anxious to start working since I'm already 25 and as of yet no experience in corporate work. It might be even harder to get hired if I wait any longer. I suppose I would like to ask for a transfer to a branch in another country eventually, but that's another issue altogether (though still with my parents, unfortunately).
Anyway, I just don't know what to do and I just wanted to let it all out. The past few days, I've been feeling worse since I keep thinking about it. Writing it all out is a bit helpful.
here it's customary to stay with your family until you get married. i have a cousin who is in her mid-30s, and her parents won't let her work abroad despite her company wanting to transfer her to another country.