You still haven't said what the goal of this method is. Is it moisture from the steam? How does this damage the phone without flipping the moisture sensors?
I bet we are all over thinking this! I say root the thing and uninstall the operating system or make it unbootable. Of course you can do the call, menu off button trick but what sales man at verizon really knows how to boot like that? Damn near NONE!
I say screw the physical damage and mess up the software.
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