I too could not get the sync to work, i searched the forum and tried everything [really everything] that was mentioned and nothing.
So just as i was at my wits end i tried doing it on my laptop, which is actually technically better than my pc. This worked no problems, i was surprised, and updated my phone with no problems at all, alas being an orange customer it was not the andriod 2.1 update tho lol.
So if you have tried everything to get it to work, try using another pc or laptop, i know its not very practical but it worked for me.