I had the same problem. I think I have figured out the work-around.
My Samsung Fascinate stopped receiving emails about a week ago ("unable to connect to server"). Today I deleted the Charter account on my phone and entered it anew. I let the phone do the set-up for me and that seemed to work like a charm, at first.
Then, I went back to Outlook on my PC and discovered it would send but not receive - error message said that I was 'locked out' because another device was accessing my account. I have gotten that message in the past when my phone was updating my email account, but the conflict would always go away after a few moments and Outlook would work again. Not the case today; this seemed to be a permanent error.
Upon further poking around it occurred to me that my Outlook account for Charter was set-up as POP3 and the phone was now set up as IMAP. I tried changing the phone to POP3, but couldn't get that to work. I used the manual set-up option, but the attempts would fail even though I entered exactly what Charter had listed on its website (why am I not surprised!).
Next I tried changing Outlook to an IMAP account. I couldn't figure out how to change the existing POP3 account so I just added an entire new account and set it up manually as IMAP (incoming server IMAP.CHARTER.NET; outgoing server SMTP.CHARTER.NET). This seemed to fix the problem at first, but alas, I could only send from Outlook and not from the phone. After pulling out some more hair I deleted the account from the phone one last time and then set it up AGAIN.
Now it seems to be working, so perhaps the order in which it was done was key, or it was just a fluke. Bottomline, first set-up the new Outlook IMAP account, next delete the old POP3 account, finally set-up the Droid IMAP account. I can't guarantee this is going to work long-term, but it has been behaving for the last several hours. I sent every variation of test message to and from myself to be sure... so far, so good, and the messages arrive virtually simultaneously in both Outlook and on the phone, no more waiting! ; )
In hindsight, I would have first gone to my Charter webmail account and deleted a bunch of messages before setting up the Outlook IMAP account. I now have 2500 duplicate emails, though they are in two different folders because IMAP feeds in to Outlook through a different protocol. I'm going to have to set-up all my 'rules' again too. Ugh! Maybe there is a better way to switch from POP3 to IMAP in Outlook, which would save some grief and work, but I didn't try to figure it out.
Hope this helps others!!!