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Tell me a joke...

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I once opened up a clown make up kit.
Went outside, thinking no one will see me,
so I put on something yellow custome.
And wear a red nose next thing, I am now at Kevin's birthday party..
Next thing I know I burst out in happiness and laughter.
Turns out I am Kevin.
 
There have been two men just bowling at the competition,
one of them turns his attention to a very fine lady who was their competition,
after they reached oh a very well game, around 235, she took off her ball cap and bowed.
"Good game, but you know like in this game, welled oiled lanes and bowling balls. I kind of wonder if you would treat me right...?"
"Well miss thank you, but I must decline besides my husband is standing next to me. We have been married for about a year."
"O"Well nice to know you have someone but was going to treat you well for such an excellent game.. That is all nothing serious. My husband is in the next lane."

So after a bit of badgering, basically a bit turns out they where siblings, both the lady and one of the other team mates.
Sorry my jokes are bad.
 
Arnold Schwarzenegger goes back to Austria for his Easter Break.

When he returns to California his friend says to him, "Arnie, I hear you went back home to Austria for Easter. How was it?"

To which Arnie replied [in Arnie voice]: "Oh it was terrible! My father, he ruined the Easter Egg hunt, he put all of the eggs in awful places and nobody could find any eggs and quite generally we all had an awful day."

His colleague then says, "Oh Arnie that's no good at all, I'm sorry to hear! Does that mean you don't love Easter anymore?"

Arnie, starting to roll away on his Moto -Sickle, shouted :
"Oh no of course not - I still love Easter, baby."
 
A man goes into a pet shop to buy a parrot. The shop owner points to three identical - looking parrots on a perch and says, "The parrot on the left costs $500 dollars."

"Why does the parrot cost so much?" asks the man. The owner says "Well the parrot knows how to use a computer."

The man then asks about the next parrot and learns that it costs $1,000 dollars because it can do everything the first parrot can do plus it knows how to use the UNIX operating system.

Naturally, the increasingly startled man asks about the third parrot, only to be told that it costs $2,000 dollars.

Illustration of 3 parrots
Needless to say this begs the question, "What can it do?"

To which the owner replies,

"To be honest I have never seen it do anything but the other two call him boss!"
 
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