I'll give you an example, being a half-assed ROM developer myself. Once in awhile, a user of my ROMs posts in the XDA thread either a question or a thanks of some sort. When this occurs, the thread goes back to the top of the forum. While at the top of the forum, I see a temporary spike in downloads and sometimes donations.
Other times I'll see a member recommend or discuss my ROM in a thread, which often leads to that person researching my ROM, then posting in my thread, and see above.
So by using a ROM and even discussing it, you're supporting it in ways that you could never even imagine. I'm not saying that it's wrong to use that ROM. From what I hear, it's an amazing ROM. I don't know exactly what he did to the developer community either, but from reading his webpage, it seems that he sees it as a badge of honor that he and his team have been banned from various developer and Android communities.
That makes sense.
I won't argue that I'm not supporting him anymore (or at the very least, inadvertantly encouraging others to support him.)
But, since I have no idea what he did, I don't have any reason to not support him. So I don't have any reason to not support him, and since I am in fact incredibly impressed with one of his roms, I actually have reasons to support him.
So I guess what I'm saying is this.
His rom kicks major butt, and I am happier and more impressed with it, than any other I've tried, including CM7. That is a big compliment, even from a newb like myself.
He may be a wonderful human being, or a real jerk. I don't know and frankly I don't care.
I never said he was a great person. I just said his rom rocks, and it does.
And if that rom can make my experience with my droid incredible that much more satisfying, then you better believe I'm gonna use it.
You know one of the reasons I was turned off by CM7? It had a practically pornographic picture as one of the wallpapers. To me that is a reason to not support them, based on my values. But if I am not mistaken, no gingerbread roms would be out there if it were not for the work done by that team. So really I am in a roundabout way supporting the Cyanogen Mod team by downloading OMGB.
I kinda view this like I do the music industry.
Just because I think a musician is a real piece of crap as a person, that doesn't stop me from listening to their music, if it's good.
The product is all I care about, not the producer.
Maybe that is shallow or even selfish, but that's how I feel.
I am not willing to deny myself the use of a rom that has taken my Incredible experience all the way from frustrating to overjoyed, just because someone says the developer did some stuff that wasn't nice way back when.