Sorry to hear about the cousin. I've only lost one 1st cousin so far, and that was to cancer. I'm on the younger end of the cousins, and I suspect the pace will unfortunately hasten.
Until I learned I had no appreciation for the art of smoking. I tend to not eat faux smoked things while I appreciate going to a good smokehouse to eat.
The sad part is smoking 100# of pork shoulder is as much work as 5#, and buffet style it's perfect. You really wouldn't even have to pull it, just put the but out there with some bear claws and let people pull it off as they go.