Here's a complete fix for the facebook contacts issue
Add back the syncing for Facebook for HTC Sense
Menu, settings, accounts & sync, add account, Facebook for HTC Sense, (when done go back to home screen)
Now go back and delete the contacts storage again
Menu, settings, applications, manage applications, manage applications, (wait for it to load), Contacts storage, Clear Data, (when done go back to home screen)
Configure settings for Facebook for HTC Sense
Menu, settings, accounts & sync, Facebook for HTC Sense, uncheck Sync contacts, (when done go back to home screen)
Finally, Re-sync Google contacts
Menu, settings, accounts & sync, Sync all, after that hit the home button and see if it all works correctly!
sorry for it being dumbed down, I typed this up for a person who isn't as technically savvy as most of us.

also this assumes that you deleted facebook for htc in the accounts and sync menu. I had her do that already.