Ok, so an epilogue to this.
I did figure out a way to disable lots more Google poop on this pathetic little device.
I do still get the warning that the device is out of date, bevging me to 'update' it, but now it is just a notification and there is no more countdown and forcing of updates.
No clue as to what app(s) are responsible, but I am glad to have it to this point.
I can now restart the device and not have a bunch of Poogle shoved down my throat.
My guess is that if I removed my Poogle account altogether that the issue would end altogether.
If and when I get all my contacts as device instead of Poogle, then I will do just that.
As it is now, all my contacts disappear if I remove the account.
I have tried to export them en mass and then import them after the account is gone, to no avail.