1) Not true. I assume you don't read Engadget, BGR, Gizmodo etc. How many stories do we get of "HERE IS THE NEW IPHONE 5 PART LOOK AT THIS SCREEN AND THIS APPLE TAG OMG SO AWESOME" or "iPad5 Pictures of cases!" etc. If your talking about direct leaks from Apple, how about losing phones in bars? It happens to everyone.
2) Your giving Apple a pass for what Verizon is attempting to do. They don't want to announce a date then miss it. Its two totally different ecosystems, one of total control of every step from software to manufacturing to one of providing a product manufactured by others while trying to deal/create a Corporate strategy that works best for you. You pointed this out yourself, then went on to rage against what you admitted has more steps and processes.
3) Verizon as far as phone companies go are fairly reliable with their "published" release dates. Again forget about all leaks and all internal documents that you were never meant to see, and go with published dates. You can't use knowledge that you gained through non official sources to attempt to blame them for this.
4) This is debatable. The Bionic was so bad it was completely redesigned 2 times, would you really have liked for them to release that phone? I'm not going to get into software, yes I would prefer to not have "Let's Golf" etc on my phone, but unfortunately its the way of the industry. As a power user I'm going to remove it and move on with my life, not worth throwing a fit over. Non power users are going to ignore it.
Regarding the rest of your rant. Verizon is a business, they exist to make money. Please don't assume they are any different than other providers. T-Mobile is cheaper because it has to be to compete in the market. Not because they are your noble friends who want you to pay less for phone service. Do I think that wireless service is extremely expensive? Yes I do. It blows my mind that behind rent and food wireless is nearly my next largest expense. That being said, I am fully aware that I am paying a premium for a luxury service. Do I need this awesome smartphone that I have? No. I could survive with a dumb phone