I finally got my system to see the phone in download mode... here's what I did.
1. attached my phone while it was on and in the normal Android OS mode
2. located my phone in device manager (under disk drives, I think)
3. went to properties (right click) for my phone, browsed to the driver tab, clicked "uninstall"
4. system prompted for a restart to complete removal. I unplugged my phone and allowed the system to restart
5. installed NEW Samsung PC Studio from a DL I found via Teh Googles (I had never used this in the past, previously I had browsed my phone's SD card via the drivers in that zip package that's floating around and on Zefie's FTP site)
6. booted my phone into download mode and plugged it into the computer. My PC immediately saw it and installed the correct drivers
7. Odin was able to correctly see my phone now, so proceeded as above.
8. upon reset of the phone after the new kernel, the PC also installed additional drivers for SD drive mode
Hopefully this helps someone else in this situation, there seemed to be a lot of us!
Oh, and after all that, I forget what should work better with the new kernel lol. Oh well, I'll figure it out, and probably uninstall some of the stock apps in the next day or two. Hooray!!